I have spent considerable time trying to figure out who I am. I really thought that answer lay in a career path. A wife and a mother didn’t seem like a sufficient answer. It was ingrained expectation that I needed a career to define myself.
I thought I had an answer when I made a decision to go back to school. I even did a project that consisted of my image as a puzzle finally being completed. When my career didn’t fill the hole I figured I must have chosen the wrong career path and I continued searching. I took quizzes and read books on finding your passion. Over the past few years I had given up that quest. I decided that I really didn’t have a desire for a career so why bother. I still felt lost though. I still couldn’t answer the question who am I.
Daddy and I have had our ups and downs but I would say at least the last ten years have been good. I saw it as a fulfilling marriage but I didn’t realize that I was still very lonely. I now think that was the hole I felt inside. Since discovering D/s a bond has formed between the two of us far stronger than anything we had felt before. It fills that void. I am whole. I am no longer lonely. I can stop looking outside and just focus on pleasing him because that nourishes our connection and makes me happy.
I must still work as it is needed and that serves him. It does not define me though.
This is me.