Yesterday he had to work most of the day and then today he was away fixing the car. As the day progressed I got more anxious. I just felt disconnected from him. I needed him. When he got home I hugged him very tightly and was on the verge of tears. He asked Did something happen? No I just missed you. There was only a slight indication of him being upset by that. I had a nice dinner ready for him and after he ate he went to take a shower. I knelt there in the bathroom while he showered. I just needed to be in the same room as him. As he was drying off he might have seemed a bit annoyed. After he dressed he stood me up and hugged me. He said Is there something you need from me? I told him I just needed to be with him.
All of this would have went down very differently before. I would have been mad at him being away most of the weekend. I probably would have given him the cold shoulder or been pissy. If I would have managed to tell him I missed him he would have taken it as he could do nothing right and gotten upset. My hovering around him often made him very visibly annoyed.
We are both learning. I responded with my true feelings. I just missed him. He understood my honesty and might have felt a bit guilty but knew I was not saying that to make him feel bad. I was simply stating the truth and I was not angry or bitter. He may have been a bit annoyed with my hovering but he understands it’s because I just want to feel close to him. He asked if I needed anything from him and when I said I just wanted to be with him he asked if I would be fine sitting with him while he watched some tv.
I am able to understand what I’m feeling and express it in a constructive manner and he is able to hear it and respond lovingly.