Dream

So I had a dream last night that Daddy decided to buy a vehicle and he didn’t consult me. I caught him buying it and I was so mad. I went on a rage in the dealership about not being consulted.

Backstory – His truck is in really bad shape. We are trying to nurse it along. There are 4.5 drivers in this household and three vehicles. Two still have loans. It is a real stress.

Honestly lately I sometimes feel under informed when it comes to things that are going on around here. Just the daily schedules. Most events are on the calendar but as far as the who is getting who and exactly how things will work I feel a bit left out of.

Part of me thinks it is because Daddy no longer worries I will be upset about him making decisions or giving the children permission to do things. Then I wonder if really it hasn’t changed but I am feeling like it has because I know I’ve given up control and sometimes that unconsciously freaks me out.

I feel out of the loop —— and there I think it is! I feel left out. One of my biggest insecurities is being left out.

Yeah yeah yeah I know! We have to talk about it.

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