“Anything or anyone that asks you to be other than yourself is not holy, but is trying only to fill its own need.” Mark Nepo – The Book of Awakening
Daddy has this mastered. His acceptance and encouragement of me being who I need to be touches my heart. It gives me comfort to not care, ok to attempt to care less, about what others think of me.
In my desire to be submissive to him I pushed and questioned him as to how he wants to see me. If there are no requests I cannot fulfil them. Tell me what to do so I can do it. Over and over again and in many ways he has said just this… I just want you to be you.
I want to be the same for him. The last two years have been amazing so I know that changes we have made are on the right track. I just have to keep reigning in myself. Accept where he is at and what he wants.
He doesn’t want to teach me his dance. He wants to watch as I invent my own. Sometimes I need ideas, I need direction. In those times I ask and he will lovingly give input and suggestions. Then he will sit back and enjoy the dance and take pride in it.
I may struggle with such freedom. I see others having their dances choreographed for them and I want the same. He is not willing to do it. He prefers the self-expression.
Today I dance with a MLP hair clip attached to my bra to remind me who I dance for.